| Hello Strangers! |
[14 May 2007|08:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 crushed |
] |
So wow, for some strange reason I have decided to come back to livejournal. Maybe because I need somwhere to vent where I think everyone has been forgotten...
I need you so much closer...
So I'm sitting at home rather dejected on occurences lately. Finding out that a someone I had feelings for has decided to stay in the same lifestyle that messed him up in the first place. Why are you so stubborn, boy? Just when I think that I have something in common with someone they turn around and do things that suck. I told myself not to get attatched, but I just couldn't help myself, you know? I don't even know why I do these things. I just end up getting dissappointed or hurting myself. Or both. Nevermind all these things then. What's the point really?
Maybe I should just stop pursuing things and lay low for a while and just hang out with my friends and wait for someone to come along that will want to pursue ME. I try to do that, but I end up just doing the same things all over again. I'm a creature of habbit. Damn. So for now I guess music and good times will be my friends. I think of myself as a smart, attractive being, and there will be someone out there for me somewhere. Eventually. That's all for now I guess.
|
|
| farewell for a while, eljay |
[13 Apr 2006|10:05pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 yyy's new cd is out! buy it! |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
yea yeah yeahs- gold lion |
] |
so i'm getting tired of doing livejournal. i guess i'm being selfish because i feel hurt that no one fucking comments on my posts anymore, and i comment. so, thpp you whores. peace out. won't hear from me for a while.
but i will check to see if you comment back on this. :/ cause i want to know if you care.
and i like the attention. no use in denying it.
sincerely,
catherine elise coker
pee ess:
the new yeah yeah yeah's CD is now out, and has been for a while. listen to it, and go buy it! i promise you'll like them!
|
|
|
[29 Mar 2006|11:09pm] |
New Cell Phone: 528-8447. Add it. Call me. Hang out with me.
Peace.
|
|
| three cheers to the mirror, now there are two of us, can we have one last dance? |
[24 Mar 2006|08:45pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
thursday_ jet black new year |
] |
haven't really had an update besides silly stuff or pictures in a while.
everything seems to be going really well. ashley has decided to take it upon herself to destroy me on her myspace and lower herself to that level. i've had my sayso about it, and it no longer concerns me. he doesn't love her anymore, i have nothing to worry about. she's still not over him, and if i were in her situation, i wouldn't be either, in all honesty. but why bash me on your myspace? are you that desperate? what is going through your head for you to have to do that to make yourself feel better? i seriously don't understand the way her brain works, or why she does the things she does. oh well. eff her. i blogged about it on myspace and that's about it. i know i probably shouldn't have even gone that far, but i couldn't help myself. but no more will be said on my part. if she wishes to react to my thoughts, so be it, if not, that's fine too. (but honestly i'm wishing she will) is that looking for drama? i hate to admit it to myself, but i think it is. the only thing that would make me the happiest right now would be for me to beat the shit outta her. but for shane's sake, i'll behave.
shane and i are doing well. after all, after we survived the first month of our relationship, and my parents and whatnot, it's pretty easy compared to that. besides, how could i resist his sweet ways? he's always nice, and for once he's the boyfriend that i can depend on, and not have to worry about like a babysitter. spending time with him seems to go by so quickly, i never want it to end. it's not in my immediate future, and i know we've only known each other for... 4 or so months, but i could see us being together throughout college, getting a place together, and being happy like that. and a looong way down the line, i could possibly see myself getting married and having a couple of kids with him, but who wants to dream like that? i'm not going to get my hopes up, therefore i won't be dissappointed, whatever happens with us.
school's going well. i had an 89 in PSDM, an 89 in Environmental & Nat. Resources, an 83 in U.S. history, and a 97 in photoshop. i'm working on bringing up my GPA, so i can get the life scholarship. my parents keep bugging me about that, because no matter what college i end up going to, money's going to be an issue, so i need all the help i can get. and i'm just worried about the whole student loans thing because my dad, granted he's not the most responsible person in paying people back, has yet to pay off all of his student loans from when he was in college. so i just don't want to be tied down like that, you know? i already know what it feels like to owe money, and i'm not even into college yet...
friends-wise i'm happy, for the most part. i've coem to realize that i have only one best friend, shane. and although i have many aquaintances, i have no idea how many of those i would consider friends. i mean, what is friends? is it the people you see at random times in the hallways? is it the bud connections you have? or is it the people you hang out with almost every weekend, who you go to the flea market with, get stoned with? go camping with? i have friends, yes, but best friends? i don't think i have ever really known what a best friend is. except for when i was a little girl. but ever since middle school, i've never really felt like i've belonged anywhere. i just tend to float from group to group, finding anyone who'll seem like a good conversation, or just hang out with me. bekah has been a good friend. leslie i wish i hung out with more. she's a good girl to hang out with. chris, charley, justin, and people at the waffle. those i feel i don't know well. i don't feel i know anyone well, except for shane.
i really can't wait for my birthday. not so much of a getting gifts thing, just basically another year to add on to say that i've gone places, i've met people, and i've done more things to experience life this year. i don't regret much, if anything at all. in my eyes it's all been a learning experience.
i have also decided that i'm not going to move out of the house when i turn 17. i'm going to wait until i've paid my parents back in full, AND saved up quite a bit of money for myself, before i put myself out into the real world with only myself to depend upon. i just think it's a good idea to at least start off with money to have a cushion, you know?
another fantasy i have is paying my parents back, saving up money, and after shane's gotten some things he wants to buy, get him to save up money too, and maybe get an apartment with him. but i woudn't want to move too fast. the earliest i see doing that with him would be maybe when i turn 18. because who knows where either of us will be down the road? i don't. and neither does he.
we're in love, and it feels great. but we've got a lot more to find out about each other. our relationship has got a long way to go before i even think about anything serious with him, like moving in with him, or becoming totally serious. it's just nice to have someone there for you all the time, someone who cares and loves you, and it's good to feel the same way about him. i love him, and i care about him so much. i thought that happiness wasn't possible, but apparently it is. not much more could be better.
so sorry if this has been a really long entry. i've just been thinking about a lot of things lately, and what i've talked about on livejournal isn't even the half of it.
|
|
|
[17 Mar 2006|09:39pm] |
|
yeah, that's what i'm talking about. let's do this. i reckon'. you think it's cool to be hittin' the sauce when you got a bun in the oven? when i say pecon does it sound wrong? randam.
|
|
|
[14 Mar 2006|11:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 awake |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
thursday_cross out the eyes |
] |
( more! )
|
|
|
[02 Mar 2006|11:15pm] |
i'm feelin kinda weird right now. probably cause it's anohter one of those thursday nights, where i wonder where he is, what he's doing. if he's safe, ok, blah blah blah.
so what for caring, and being fucking jealous.
|
|
| hermy manville |
[21 Feb 2006|03:10pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 creative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
against me!_ miami |
] |
1. kat
(n) 1. a fine ass bitty. 2.a hot girl that rubs the back of her man.HEY, check out that Kat!
well, well, well. i guess it's just like that, then, isn't it?
|
|
| cause they taste like dead cathedrals.. crumbling beneathe the weight |
[11 Feb 2006|02:42pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 , but ready to roll |
] |
yoga is probably the most relaxing and self-good thing i've done for myself in quite a long time. i think it shall become a more often thing to do. it made me so relaxed and calm. plus the fact that it really works my flexibility, which i need to work on for the dance recital coming up, and tones my musclies! so yay for that... cause according to someone i am fat and need to loose the chub. hah, just kidding shane. :D
work now, and then sabrina's after work. i miss hanging out with her. i feel kinda bad that i haven't been there for her as much as i should be lately. but tonight will be a good night, and not work or anything else is going to get in the way of that.
i love you.
|
|
|
[11 Feb 2006|12:11am] |
i'm so fucking happy i could die.
ok not really, cause then i would miss you.
|
|
|
[08 Feb 2006|11:32pm] |
ok.. so maybe i do love you...
♥
|
|
|
[08 Feb 2006|09:39pm] |
What a beautiful way to fake it
a sort of graceful defeat
we pound a pattern out on the pavement
we sound a siren out through the streets
advance with perfect nonchalance
to the staccato of the rifle report
don't marvel out our confidence
it's just bravado that a blindfold affords
You tell me that you wanna stop the war
but baby you can't dance if there's no floor
motion isn't meaning, it's just another drug
but it's all we've got
What a way to keep it together
a black box, a prescription for speed
we found a freeway that goes on forever
we drown a demon in the deep black sea
Shield your eyes
keep running to the rhythm of the rifle repeating
I'm paralyzed
but I gotta keep moving if I want to keep breathing
You tell me that you wanna stop the war
but baby you can't dance if there's no floor
motion isn't meaning, it's just another drug
but it's all we've got... we've got nowhere to go
I'll take the knife or the easy chair
we are but gods for a moment
I'll take the knife or the easy chair
we are but gods
|
|
| as i open bloodshot eyes |
[07 Feb 2006|11:25pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 hopeful |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
thrice_ eleanor rigby |
] |
i'm taking a chance.
i'm putting my blind faith in you baby.
i hope that i will never let you down.
i hope we will never fade away.
i want you to be my everything, soul and body.
yeah, i'm putting my blind faith in you baby,
but i fear it'll all turn out okay in the end...
♥♥♥
♥♥
♥
.
|
|
|
[30 Jan 2006|08:24pm] |
| You Have a Choleric Temperament | 
You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things.
Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life.
You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation.
You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon.
Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall.
You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others.
At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults.
Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion.
A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior. |
| You Should Get an Abstract Tattoo | 
Artistic and unique
You're the most likely type to personally design your tattoo |
|
|
|
[24 Jan 2006|10:59pm] |
you know what, on a latter note to the post i just posted,
FUCK EVERYTHING. WHY DO I EVEN FUCKING TRY TO MAKE YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE HAPPY.
THANK-YOU, and go fuck yourself.
|
|
|
[20 Nov 2005|09:48pm] |
|
AGAINST ME! was so fucking amazing you wouldn't believe...
|
|
| it's my time today |
[28 Oct 2005|10:55pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bouncy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
coheed and cambria_ delirium trigger |
] |
|
|
| from a.j. |
[27 Oct 2005|09:52pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cold |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Coheed and Cambria_ Blood Moon Summer |
] |
Do you have porn under your bed?
No
Last comic book you read?
I have no effin' clue. Do the Nancy Drew books count?
Do you have plants in your room?
I have fake plastic plants in my fish tank....
What do you hear right now?:
Mom and Alan talking about... news hour, public t.v.
If you could drink anything right this second, what would it be?
My mom's homemade "apple spider".
Last piece of mail opened:
A letter from Danny
What's your job position called?:
NUGGET GIRL
What size shoe do you wear?:
9 1/2 - 10
Does anything hurt on your body right now?
No
What city was your last taxicab ride in?
New York City, baby.
Do you own a picture phone?
No, I don't even have a cell phone atall.
What was your 6th grade homeroom teacher's name?
I have no effin' clue about that either...
Kool Aid or Hawaiian Punch?:
Hawaiian Punch
What's the last song you heard on the radio?:
Some rap song on 100.1
What were you doing at 9 pm last night?
Making guacamole dip.
What's your favorite late night post partying/clubbing food?
Herm... cinnamin toast.
Do you exercise as much as you should?
I dance twice a night on Wednesdays.
Did you or will you attend your High School reunion?
If I remember.
Did you go to someone else's prom?:
No.
Did you do the deed on grad night?
No.
Would you give your bf/gf a third chance if they cheated on you?
No.
Ever been aroused by a midget?:
Can't say that I have...
Can you blow bubbles with bubble gum?:
Yes
Surfing or Snowboarding?
I've snowboarded more than surfed, so snowboarding.
Favorite Jello flavor:
Grape
The weirdest thing you've ever bought:
Brice's man thong for his birthday.
Have you ever read the Bible?
Not a lot of it.
Ever done the Roger Rabbit?:
I don't know what that is.
Do you look good in neon pink?
Never tried the look...
Ever danced naked in front of your front room window?
With the blinds closed.
Have you ever ate paper?
Definitely beats cannibalism...
Ever thrown up after riding a roller coaster?
I almost did, at Six Flags with the band, when we rode that spacecraft thing that goes in vertical circles SEVEN TIMES, AFTER EATING. but surprsingly, i didn't. :)
Ever play any organized sports?
Soccer.
Least favorite vegetable?
Squash. It makes me gag.
Do you believe in the Loch Ness Monster?
No
Ever been to a graveyard at night?:
Yes...
Last Pez dispenser you purchased?
Golly G Whiz I dunno.
Have you had sex in a barn?
No, but that's where I was conceived.
Did you have a good weekend?
Had to work, but other than that, it was okay.
Current yearning:
THE PARTY ON SATURDAY THAT I MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO GO TO AFTER ALL. and i even spent 15 dolla on a pumpkin!
Last Hostess snack you ate:
Twinkie, a loooong time ago.
Do you eat fruit daily?:
No.
Ever break somebody's arm?:
No.
Ever performed in front of a crowd?:
Yes.
Do you go into chat rooms?:
Used to, but all it ever was/ still is is a bunch of horny teens asking for naked pics. :/
Favorite kind of fruit juice?:
Orange all the way.
Ever have a snail-mail penpal that you've never met?:
No.
How old were you when you first rode a bike without training wheels?
4?
How is today going for you?
Okay. School was boring as usual. Got to spend a little time over at Sabrina's, as usual. Went to venturning. That was EL LAMO.
Any plans for tonight?
Try to log onto Myspace, go to bed.
Ever photograph something that was dead?
No. Why would I do that?
Are you ready for Halloween?
Most definitely.
Ever given someone a Full-Body oil massage?
No.
Favorite cartoon character?
Pépé le Pew.
Current disappointment:
Getting 4 days of after-school, and maybe not getting off probation to go to the party.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
mandibletongues's journal
calm